Week 27...

If you can give your son or daughter only one gift, let it be enthusiasm.

- Bruce Barton


The countdown has begun. What seemed so surreal is now only a few months away from becoming reality, and my emotions have done a good job taking over me. My trip to Toronto was eventful and filled with great moments. My baby shower was fun and the N&R wedding went well, two milestones that have come and gone. The next big thing at this point is waiting for our baby to make his way into this world.

Saying good-bye to my friends and family seemed harder than usual this time. I guess in my mind it made things that much more real, knowing the next time I see everyone will be with my… son. I am overwhelmed, excited, nervous, scared and of course full of love for this little being inside me that has made clear he is around.

The punches and kicks are getting stronger as the days progress and I can’t help just lay there and watch. My first thought was “Wow, if I am this in love with him now…how much more can I love him when he is finally around us?”
That’s where the love and excitement come into play. As for scared and nervous…well, that’s a different story all together. We bought our little man’s baby furniture last week. I was excited until I got home and broke down. Reality hit. Could this be the greatest love of my life? Thus far, V was it, and now, this ‘non-existent’ person whom I am yet to meet is going to take over and our lives are going to be completely different than what we have known all these years. We are buying furniture for a little person who is coming to stay with us, for good - not just for a visit. Being far away from home also doesn’t help. What if I don’t know what to do? What if I am not the perfect mom? What if my little guy doesn’t like me? What if my husband loves me less?

All natural, I am sure (or at least hope)! Life is definitely going to be different and I cannot wait for that day to come. Some people wait a lifetime for a moment just to dwell in this happiness, I am making sure I enjoy every single day until that very moment. I will stand by my baby forever and ensure he is well taken care of, and well entertained. I am sure my version of ‘Baby’s Got Back’ will be just as entertaining if not more than the version performed on Friends. I will speak to him about life, read to him about fantasy and show him all the beautiful things the world has to offer. I pray he will be my guide, to a more beautiful world than what we see and hear on the news these days. There is hope, and maybe our little man can one day make that difference.

So the story continues…..

Physically - I feel I need a crane to help me get off the couch.
Emotionally - I am like a roller coaster waiting to fall off its tracks.

Am I enjoying being pregnant? ABSOLUTELY!!

I pray the little guy can feel my enthusiasm on a daily basis…thus far; it seems that’s the only gift I can offer him.