Where Is My North Star?

"You have to count on living every single day in a way you believe will make you feel good about your life -- so that if it were over tomorrow, you'd be content with yourself."
Jane Seymour

Time is running out. My life in Toronto is not going to be my life anymore. By the end of next month, I will be leaving it all behind. I’m starting to feel the surge of emotions on a daily basis. Life at work is not the same. I feel I am abandoning the team of ‘Angels’ I became so close with in such a short period of time. Who will I have my daily tête-à-tête’s with regarding happiness and self-awareness? These discussions have led me to learn a lot about our planet – Venus. I never realized how so many women are absorbed with Mars in a way that forces them to forget ‘what planet THEY THEMSELVES are from’. By doing so, they’re conforming to what Mars wants out of this universe. What is up with that? Why are women so quick to change what they need and feel to ensure their significant others are happy? One of my fellow ‘Angels’ is currently trying to discover where her ‘North Star’ is. She is determined to find the cause of her pain and figure out why she hasn’t found the happiness she ultimately deserves. We deserve to lead our lives in such a way that makes us happy “most of the time”. We can’t just settle in accordance to what others have in plan.
Life experiences lead us to be the people we are today. In my case, I feel I’ve been faced with a number of challenging situations that have created the person I am. The loss of my father's well-established business was not only devastating, but a complete downfall as a family. We went from having everything, to having nothing. At fifteen years old, I had to lend a shoulder for my father to cry on, and be strong for a man who once was stronger than I. It was tough, but I stood there and always made sure we were ok, even if we were not. Life from that point on has been anything but easy for my family. It’s hard to see a unit go through an overwhelming demise as such, but it made us a team. It made me value my family more than anything. It made me who I am today. Then came my grandfather's passing. One year ago this time was when I saw my ‘dédé’ take his last breath, while holding my hand. The sadness will never escape my heart and the vision will never leave my mind. Through these and other various experiences, I have managed to turn the tough times into life lessons while reveling in my own beautiful life. The best part of my happy condition is I tend to be contagious. I am comfortable in my own skin – the world sees me as a happy person. But am I really? Most can relate, few can understand. We need to remind ourselves life isn’t about settling, dwelling and waiting. It’s about making things happen and always maintaining a positive outlook. Let the past be gone, use it to move forward…. use it to make the future better… it’s like a limited edition game…we only have one shot, really!

The Splendor of a Friend

Friend - A person whom one knows well and is fond of, an ally, supporter or sympathizer – Collins Pocket English Dictionary.
The saying ‘friends come and go’ is used frequently, especially when growing up. Fortunately, my friends have all stayed. The foundation of all our personalities I believe is strongly based on what we’ve learned and seen from those around us. My truest friends are the ones who speak like me, act like me and can eat like me. Saying this, it works the same other way around. My vocabulary consists of such sayings as “Like, can it be any colder?” or “HI…what’s up with that?” This is part of the cleverly established subliminal language of the G7 - also known as the ‘Group of 7’. We’re 7 women from similar walks of life with many different stories to tell. Our lives are like a reality show waiting to happen – all we need is to be discovered. We make a point to see each other on a bi-weekly, if not weekly, basis. The point of these get-togethers is to ‘share’ with the rest of the group, and give an update on what is happening in our lives. We laugh, we cry, we vent and we divulge. Although, I must admit, sometimes I feel like I share way more than my fellow 7-ers. Does everyone have to share the same amount? I guess it depends on how comfortable one feels about her situation and if it’s something they feel comfortable in discussing. This past weekend was our annual girls weekend away – this year’s theme was ‘Pig Fest 04’. And boy did we live up to the name. We ate like pigs, danced around a fire as though performing an Indian ritual & we baked (more like fried) on the beach with the aid of Hawaiian Tropic. In process of doing all this, we made sure to include the ‘sharing’ in our 2-day jaunt. We talked about having too much sex, or lack thereof, and described our individual experiences. It was a memorable weekend!
Each of us are on different pages in our lives. Some are married, others are dating, and one is already a mother. We’re there to give each other the best advice and support we can through whatever challenges and obstacles come our way – BUT – what if our advice to one another is too harsh? Does that make us bad friends if we give harsh advice? Or does it make us bad friends if we don’t give our most honest opinion whether or not it’s painfully bleak? I always make sure to be straightforward yet kind, that is the gift I bring to the Group of 7. I just hope my frankness doesn’t come across as being offensive and hurtful! ....Isn't honesty the best policy?

How Do We Not 'Sweat the Small Stuff?'

The weekend of June 25th was anything but normal. What started off as a relaxing Saturday at home turned out to be a hectic and nerve-wracking experience. I was driving to the drugstore to buy a few necessities when my cell phone rang with Shake devastated on the other end. She was faced with a situation that terrified her and forced her to take action by steering to the nearest emergency unit of a local hospital. We spent almost 4 hours agonizing over the unknown until we were finally told her condition was nothing to fear - baby 'K' would be all right. Having been faced with a situation as such really opened our eyes to the notion of rest and ‘taking-it-easy’. Taking it easy?? Wow, my life has been anything BUT THAT the past while. Since ‘THE SIGN’ went up last week, we were faced with multiple offers on our beloved home, and finally sold for more than the asking price. With V away I was a wreck, trying to organize our life in the best way possible. In the meantime, those close to me were experiencing the loss of a 3-month-old ‘thought’. Much to our disbelief, Shake was back in the hospital on Monday only to discover her 3 month old dream had never made it past 6 weeks. The devastation we all felt for her was beyond explanation, but now, a week after this sad news, she is doing much better and will move on with her life. A new ‘thought’ will hopefully be awaiting them in the near future. This experience has really made me re-evaluate what matters in life and how important it is to NOT sweat the small stuff. The question this time is…how do we know what is ‘small enough’ to NOT worry. Something that may be small for me can be huge for the next person?! My move to Mexico is HUGE for me…so I worry. Shake’s loss was huge for her, so she worries. What I’m trying to say here is, no matter how small or how big the matter is, depending on how passionate one may feel about the situation, it can be huge. Size does matter…depending on the individual. We are products of human nature; we can’t help but ‘sweat the small stuff’…after all, we’re women.